by Botwins Are Dead

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(free) 02:52


released January 28, 2016

Written and recorded by Duane Bundy
Additional vocals and flute by Karen Armstrong



all rights reserved


Botwins Are Dead Grand Forks, North Dakota

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Track Name: New Age Healer
"Maybe I need a new age healer to make me feel better about all my fake problems. I just can't seem to solve them alone."
Track Name: Clawing At The Wound
"It's like watching him claw at the wound...sleeping through the afternoon. Well, I get tired just looking at you."
Track Name: Husbands Pretend They're In Love
"Longsleeves cover your arms, but we know which drug you're on. Reasons to stay inside...so early, they turn off streetlights. You've worn the same clothes four days in a row. What sad anger I have for bitter men that want you caged. I promise you will breathe real air. The quiet we're used to will disappear. Promises make me feel numb, but that's alright. Husbands pretend they're in love, so will I."
Track Name: Deeper Sleep
Seems harder to blend in, feeling the weight of my own body. There's a pack of wolves ready to bite anything that will bleed. And, they gather outside my front door, waiting for the moment I decide to leave. Both of my lungs feel weak, kinda seems like they're made of glass. Each shallow word I let out finds it's way right back. I refuse to argue with myself every night before bed, You love me and my damaged brain. Really hope this isn't permanent
Track Name: Drunx Crawl Home
Three blocks from the river, all the drunks crawl home from crowded bars...leaving broken glass in the Alley of Love. No mind for the details. We're all just passing by. Dying to meet you, before the morning light turns us into ugly people, with decades to waste on our normal lives. Three blocks from the river, all the drunks crawl home from crowded bars...leaving broken glass in the alley of love.
Track Name: Elle
"I like to mumble your name, when you're near or when I'm by myself. My curved jaw gives slanted speech, but you pretend you like the way it sounds. Please lie again. Please lie to me, now. I still wonder what our kids would have looked like, when I sleep alone. I hoped they'd keep your bold face and not the sadness you hold close.
Track Name: Three Wives
"Let three wives in. Can a polygamist tell me what real love is? Make me a Christian?
I took the stairs to avoid you...stepped out in cold air. The ground met my shoes."
Track Name: Middle Child
Instead of washing the dishes, I threw them away...and left a mess in the kitchen, for someone else another day. You didn't ask to come over, but knocked three times on the heavy door and guessed my birth order. A middle child; not the last, one before.
You will lose all that you gain...kind people, normal days
You will lose all that you gain...kind people, normal days
Track Name: Dead Language
"I'll never seem real again, to the people I grew up with. Small towns make lonely men, who drink too much beer and plant gardens.
You can't compare love to a dead language that made sense to us once. I can't let myself forget. We can spend whole days asking the same question, while the answer always stays the same. Time blurs out our faces.
Your hair dries in curls, unlike anyone else I've loved before. Pull it away from your face, so I can pretend I know you."
Track Name: You Look Sad Today
I left my lighter on your bed, as an excuse to return. We met inside the doorway. Maybe I won't go home.
Nothing moves in my apartment...cables and dirty clothes cover the floor. It's only a few blocks away. I can leave...you look sad today.
Doesn't have to make sense - How simple your life has been, before now.
It doesn't have to make sense, how simple life has been, before now.
Track Name: Calm Release
"I'll spend the rest of my day putting flowers on graves of people I've never met. We'll eat off of styrofoam plates, in an empty room, with the bed unmade. Watching the calendar bleed into the next day...on repeat, 'till we're just like 'them'. Chasing the deepest sleep I've ever had ---- The calm release you only feel when you're dead...feel when you're dead...feel when you're dead."
Track Name: I'll Cut My Hair When The Weather Changes
I'll cut my hair, when the weather changes, again. You'll see me as someone else and we can start again. Look at me closer...the short lines I've told to cut you off...there are new lines across my face that also fool you. Lay and watch my unravel, or turn your head to the change. My mind shifts with the weather while nothing pure stays the same.
Track Name: Hum The Words
"I'll write the sad parts. You'll hum the tune. Together, we'll fall apart in your living room. You've known for a while now,..you change the way I dream, but when I call you 'pretty', you just look away from me.
Now that we're grown, and your mother doesn't lay out your clothes, forget the way that you felt. Bother somebody else.
Friends that we have can't be made to feel bad for you when all those makeshift plans give you nothing to look forward to."
Track Name: Painted Fox
"There's a painted fox, hanging in my living room. It's eyes never shut...and always seem to follow you. I'm awake, earlier than usual, waiting for the sun...never really comfortable with the ones that I love."
Track Name: Anna Slow Death
"When Anna says she looks forward to tying the knot, marriage is the last thing on her mind. She wants to hang herself in the parking lot, across the street from your third floor apartment (the one you settled into after the last of your arguments with her).
And when she dies, maybe you'll know better than to take sides against the saddest person that you know.
But, we can can pretend she's still alive. Spinning wild, around the room, making new memories in our minds of her. Shirts are folded and set aside, now. Her perfume's still by the mirror...you spray yourself and lay on the ground, outside.
Now that she died, maybe you'll know better than to take sides against the saddest person that you know.
Track Name: Wilt In the Shallow Light
All those vows we made, as kids....don't seem outlined now, as they did then. Would I know you voice that time's made different? And, in your new words, am I still your fucking friend? I'll never ask you. I'll never ask. But, when I smell the lilacs, accented by the rain...I still start to wonder if you view me the same way. I'll never ask you. I'll never ask. Slow, invisible death grabs you by the neck and says you can't make it well within your self.
Track Name: Abandoned, Before You Left
Aged worth, carried over months...what you want, held in wrinkled hands. All I have is not my own, it's all bought or borrowed. Abandoned before you even left. Walls lined with items that you kept hidden away, on high shelves....give signs of your old self,